The Spectacular Extravaganza of Many Whacky Things
by LucyOfNarnia
Summary: "Do ya think I've lost me marbles?"  Kid Blink's mouth dropped open, his one good eye widening. "You serious?"  "Serious as a heart attack"  "Wow, dat's pretty serious!" Some ficlets starring our dear newsies. What crazy things might they encounter?
1. Is Spot Crazy?

**The Spectacular Extravaganza of Many Whacky Things by LucyofNarnia**

_ Disclaimer: I don't own anything from the film Newsies._

_ Note:__ This my friends, is my own possibly pathetic attempt at a humor fic. If you know me, I usually stick to drama and adventure. I don't know how long this story will get to be, it depends on the inspiration. So I hope you will enjoy, and let me know what you think, and what I need to improve. Have a **Specatacular** day!_**  
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** Is Spot Crazy?  
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"I think I'm seein' things," Spot Conlon muttered; fixing his eyes on the little girl dancing around in a frilly, hot pink dress on HIS lawn. The boy covered his face with his hands, while giving an uncharacteristic whimper. He heard a giggle from beneath him, and peaked between two fingers to see the pink clad child in front of him, smiling and poking his leg. Spot proceeded to be even more out of character by falling back on his porch steps with high, surprisingly girly shriek. As soon as he had recovered his wits, he did the only the he could in this situation- unhooked his trusty cane, and gave the creature a sound hit on the head. Now, normally, Spot Conlon wouldn't think of hitting a girl, especially little, or pretty ones. But strange apparitions= those were different, and he had hit this one with gusto. Hitting stuff was always the answer, it made your problems go away. Including the problems of imaginary people. The boy watched in satisfaction as the child fell to the ground, looking dazed, then beginning to cry.  
>Spot's smile faded when he realized the so called "apparition" hadn't disappeared.<br>"Oh man, oh man," he muttered, leaning over to pick up the sobbing girl. Her gaze was so deadly, it just made him feel worse. She promptly socked him in the nose.  
>"Why-you little-" he closed his mouth with a loud, SMACK! "I desoived that." The little girl nodded, and continued to stare at him. Spot could hardly take her intense look. "OKAY!" he yelled, "I'm sorry," he finished in a whisper. The girl nodded, then planted a kiss on his reddened nose, before scampering off to play. Spot scratched his head. "Oh!" he moaned. "Man, I'm so loony."<br>X-X  
>"Blink," he asked later, eating a MLT (Mutton, lettuce, and tomato) sandwich in Tibby's Diner. "Do ya think I've lost me marbles?"<br>Kid Blink's mouth dropped open, his one good eye widening. "You serious?" he questioned, his voice coming out strangled. (He was actually trying to hold in a laugh.) Now, Blink found himself liking the idea of Spot being crazy- it gave him something to talk about with his pals.  
>"Serious as a heart attack," Spot said calmly, his face not betraying his warring emotions.<br>Kid Blink's mouth dropped open again. "Wow. Dat's pretty serious.." Spot nodded, feeling oh-so-sorry for himself. "Why don't ya tell me about it?" Kid Blink prodded, obviously not caring about Spot's tender state of mind.

The Brooklyn leader felt like glaring, but decided that in his current condition, it would make him seem even more insane. "Well," he said slowly, eying Blink's overly excited face distrustfully. "Last night I'm pretty sure I saw a dog wave at me, and dis mornin', dere was a girl in a really pink dress playin on my lawn." He left out what else had happened, deciding he would lose points for whacking a kid – stupid quck reflexes!

Blink nodded, his face terribly grave. "Yup. Definitely crazy."

_Note: Looking for a good 'humor' story? Try **'And That's Mary Sue'**, written by Austra_


	2. Play Ball

_Note: Hehe. What do ya'll think?_

**Play Ball**

"AAAAHHHHHGHHHHHHHHHGHHH!" The scream tore through the air, coming from the empty lot behind the Newsboy's Lodging house. David was immediately alarmed, fearing one of the boys had gotten themselves into a terrible accident. The boy ran toward the sound, almost tripping over Bumlets and Skittery, who sat on the back stoop, calmly watching the display with interest.

"Wha-what's going on?" David asked.

Skitts' face took on a rather evil smile. "Here's how it went," he began.

XO

"Hey Jack, Blink, ya wanna play baseball with me an' the boys?" Mush queried excitedly. Jack straightened his cowboy hat cockily.

"Well, I'm not suah if you boys can keep up with me, but uh, suah, I'll play." He swaggered from the room, trying to look like a real cowboy (It really looked like badly disfigured bowed legs.)

"Uh, suah," Blink consented, making sure his leather eye patch was secure.

"Okay, Boots is playing foist base, I'm at second, and Jake is on third. Who wants to bat foist?" Mush asked, holding up a scratched and battered baseball bat that _might _have seen better days. A couple of kids shrugged, but no one volunteered when Jack started hopping around like a three year old.

"Oh! Oh! Oh! Pick me! Pick me! Pick me!"

Mush pretended to think for a moment, before his good-natured smile shone out. "Well Jack, I'se guess you'se is goin' foist!"

Jack nodded, grinning wildly as he grabbed the bat and sauntered over to the board they had placed as a makeshift home plate. Swifty took the pitcher's spot, and pulled his arm back, tossing the ball. Jack swung grandly, his bat cutting through the air like uh.. a knife through butter! (?)

"Yeah!" he cheered, raising his fists in the air, before jogging slowly- it had to be a home run after all, he didn't need to overexert himself.

"Uh, Jack?" Swfity said, concerned greatly.

"Yeah?" Jack asked, not pleased with the interruption to his glory.

"Ya didn't hit the ball."

Jack looked back to home plate. The dusty, old ball sat there in the dirt, right next to the plate. The Manhattan leader scratched his head. "We'll give it another go," he finally proclaimed, taking up the bat again.

This continued until Jack FINALLY hit a dribbler in the dirt, and made it to first. (All the newsies wiped their foreheads, relieved.)

"Is it my turn to pitch?" Blink asked as Swifty passed him the ball. The other newsie confirmed it, and Kid Blink pulled his arm back, about to pitch it to Snipeshooter, who was at bat at last.

"Wait a minute," Jack interrupted. Kid Blink sighed. "Let me show you the right way, okay?" Jack asked, (it was more of a statement.) "Now, in ordah for you ta see how to properly pitch, you hafta be battin'."

Kid Blink took up the bat from poor Snipes who wondered if he would ever get the chance to hit.

"I'm ready Jack," Blink confirmed, gripping the bat like a true ball player.

Jack grinned. "Here we go!" he crowed, pulling his arm back, and hurling the ball as hard as he could toward the general direction of the batter's box.

XO

"AAAAHHHHHGHHHHHHHHHGHHH!" Kid Blink screeched, clutching his good eye where the ball had only just connected rather painfully. "Me eye! Me eye!"

David was a bit horrified by the story as he watched Blink stumble about blindly for a moment. Jack Kelly looked stricken. "Blink, I didn't mean to," he said, "Just a lucky.. miss."

Blink screamed again before rushing toward Jack. "I'll moidah ya! You bummah! You jus had to hit me good eye!"

Jack the um.. slightly humbled, took off towards the lodging house, hurtling the three boys on the steps in his fear of Blink.

"I'll soak ya!" Blink followed, so perhaps a bit of vision had returned.

But Skittery shook his head, pressing his lips together. "Poor Jack," he said after a moment, "It was nice knowin' him."


End file.
